into the snow

snowy morning. and a decision to warm up the house by baking lemon bread for ourselves & the neighbors.

snowy cat feet. (she was shocked but curious)

snowy night.

reminded me of the wonderful book,  A Snowy Day, Ezra Jack Keats,

crunch crunch crunch his feet sank into the snow
he walked with his toes pointing out, like this.
he walked with his toes pointing in, like that.
then he dragged his feet s-l-o-w-l-y to make tracks.

eula's dress

eula myrtle derrick. she was born in 1893, married in 1914, had two daughters, and then died young in 1925.

we're only indirectly related, as she was the older sister to my great grandmother allie.

i find myself completely intrigued by her beautiful hair, those dark, intense eyes and the amazing dress.

she looks like she had a lot on her mind, and many things to say. I hope that she was able to.

all the many words

grandma & I think, her father.

I made a quick visit to Kansas to see my grandma. because as she told me, she's "feelin poorly".
am very happy I saw her. her blue eyes & her smile will always be a part of me.
while there, I looked through photo albums. and found some pictures to take pictures of.

on the front porch at the farm

for me, every picture is a moment of a story. a clue to a day in the life. and I find I gravitate towards the pictures that were unposed, a little blurred, or maybe just seemingly abstract, simply a glimpse into meaning....the photographer had a reason behind the moment, but it might be up to us now to figure it out.

mother derrick and her chickens

waking sun

though days are usually powerfully sunny here, the sun has a hard time getting into the windows of our thick, old adobe walls.

except each morning, here in the kitchen.  and it often makes me smile.

birthday explore

the birthday plan had been that if the weather was bad, we'd watch movies all day.
but the weather was instead lovely. so we packed a faspa-style picnic, put on some layers, and headed out to explore.

from the cebolla mesa, where we ate sitting in what we decided was an old buffalo wallow. in the middle of the mesa desert, with no sound but the wind in the trees.
& then a drive up the mountains to near cabresto lake.

 where we found snow. and foraged the forest for pine boughs, wild rose hips & pine cones.

later we ate burgers, and a peaches & cream crumble pie. and he fell asleep from all the pie.
he thanks me for spending this time with him, doing his favorite things for a birthday. but now I can't imagine my life any other way.

seventh

a tractor ride. a kansas blue sky. his seventh birthday.

his cheeks aren't as chubby anymore. but his stories & ideas keep getting better.

and then the brother's birthday too. and though now 38 & 40, we are still her sweet ones.

1,000 miles

the train takes me the 1,000 miles back & forth, from kansas & new mexico,
and i'm learning the many definitions of "home"

light for the dark

November Night
by Adelaide Crapsey

Listen ..
With faint dry sound,
Like steps of passing ghosts,
The leaves, frost-crisp'd, break from the trees,
and fall.

all hallow's day

he asked to carve the pumpkin.

a day for remembrance of the people whose spirits are with us.
our hallowed ones. 
we celebrate those at peace.
a day for all saints.

and tomorrow, the souls. dia de los muertos.
a day in which we provide light for those that still search the darkness. 

And I am called pumpkins.

Theme in Yellow
by Carl Sandburg

I SPOT the hills
With yellow balls in autumn.
I light the prairie cornfields
Orange and tawny gold clusters
And I am called pumpkins.
On the last of October
When dusk is fallen
Children join hands
And circle round me
Singing ghost songs
And love to the harvest moon;
I am a jack-o'-lantern
With terrible teeth
And the children know
I am fooling.

ceremony under the aspens

this past weekend was a wedding of friends.
being a couple that love the mountains, they of course wanted to marry with the mountains all around them. so we all traveled up to an old forest service cabin.

it was cold enough that we needed to wear our long underwear.
and we, including the bride, were wearing boots instead of fancy shoes.

a few of us arrived early. to start a warm fire near the old cabin, and set up the chairs in a field surrounded by yellowing aspens and perennially green trees.

one of my new favorite photos. d in his tweed, doing the duty of groomsmen. cutting down aspen boughs in which to decorate the chuppah. the groom had built it with fallen aspen trees. and his friends covered it in a canopy of white branches & yellow leaves. 

the chuppah became almost invisible in the landscape.

little snowflakes began to fall just before the ceremony. a beautiful representation of the season.

and the guests sat with blankets. or warmed by the fire.
and it seemed every one knew it was the perfect kind of place for a wedding.

mazel tov.

sunny canyon walk

 last weekend we took a walk. we needed some fresh air & sunshine.

 

 along the rim of the rio de pueblo canyon.

the yellow chamisa is shining brightly right now. and it looks lovely against the gray green brown rock.

and we were rather thrilled when we realised we were being watched by bighorn sheep. a scattered herd of them. they would jump around the rocks, munch a little, and then watch us awhile.

it was a nice, long walk. down into the canyon and up to the rio pueblo.
at the bottom of the trail we sat at the water, and listened to the trees.
and on our walk up, we filled our pockets with rocks full of shiny mica or tiny, clear crystals.

he likes that he gets to show me these things. and I like it too.

light moving

it is clearly getting colder when the cat is choosing to be inside on the couch while still daylight out.

the light now fills our kitchen all afternoon.

and the mountains are turning green to golden.

and I find myself craving roasted root vegetables, warm pastas and hot, spicy tea.

fall signs

a few last handfuls as the air grows too cold for ripening.

replacing the house flip-flops with house slippers.

and driving home from winfield. with the landscape changing. kansas, oklahoma & new mexico.

we had a week in kansas, with all the weather and all our family & friends.
and a 9-hr drive home makes winfield seem all that more important.

 the farmer's market is full of pumpkins, squash of all sorts, apples & fall flowers. I bought an odd-shaped green & orange pumpkin. little apples. and some dragon-lady red dahlias.

and as it rains in the mountains above, I have a second batch of zucchini bread in the oven.

peaches & almonds

i love my gluten. but have been curious about how baking without it could work out. we were invited to dinner last week, and I offered up dessert, knowing that it would be appreciated if gluten-free. I had it decided inside my brain, that it would be almonds & peaches.

a few years ago I decided to pay more attention to how my body felt after eating certain foods. this was my attempt to transition from unhealthily obsessing over how much I ate into a more moderate obsession with what I was eating. we can't always get rid of eating disorders, but we can try real hard to convert them into better versions of themselves.

it wasn't long before I finally accepted that eating foods full of words I couldn't pronounce was a bad idea. and that I needed to focus more on fresh foods, whole grains and avoid additives & preservatives. eat healthy & therefore feel healthy.

i'm not convinced the recent widespread gluten-allergies, lactose-allergies, nut allergies are legitimate. right now they seem more like trends than they do fact. but if someone wants to avoid wheaty gluten goodness because they feel better when they do, then by all means, they should.

but hey, baking gluten-free looks complicated. & I wasn't interested in investing in rice flour, tapioca starch, xanthan gum and all the substitutes needed to replicate the action of a fine, gluten full flour. I just wanted simple.  
 

so i baked an almond crust with ground-up almonds, sugar, some butter & an egg. I baked it until firm & golden.

I let the crust cool a little. and then into it I poured freshly sliced peaches that had been soaking in sugar, lemon juice, cinnamon & nutmeg.
and I dropped little cubes of butter all over the peach mixture.
then baked until the peaches were covered in bubbling syrup.

it came out looking simple & delicious.
and it was like eating a sweet, nubby almond crunch. with cinnamon-peach juices.
we didn't miss the gluten. 

a nice finish to the red chile chicken enchiladas and salad of fresh greens which we ate with views of the mountains growing dark.

a mom's weekend

before I left Kansas, mom had given me several packets of sunflower seeds.
they started blooming in time for her visit.

for the first time I was picking someone up at the train.

spent our weekend walking around town, showing mom  the places that i'm growing familiar with.
we visited the Millicent Rogers museum, a maze of rooms housing an astonishing & enviable array of native american & southwestern jewelry, art & religious antiquities.

and then we walked up a little road to the once home of Mabel Dodge. and thought about living in such a beautiful spot in a Taos of so long ago.

two places I'd wanted to see. and was happy to see along with mom & d.

 and now it is time to ready for Fall. bringing plants inside. thinking about how a garden should ready the winter. spending a week camping at winfield. losing the flipflops and stuffing my feet into real shoes. changing from tomatoes, cucumbers and peaches to apples & squash.

baking for flowers

on a lovely evening we had special guests over for dinner. we grilled burgers, made pasta salad with fresh corn, cucumbers, basil and salty pepitas.
I baked hamburger buns. and though oddly shaped, they came out well. helped I'm sure by the glaze of melted butter.

to continue the adventure in baking, I also made a lemon cake. it came out dense, moist and not too sweet. served with sliced freshly picked very sweet peaches.

in return I received a huge bouquet of wonderful kansas-inspired flowers.

I got to bake for people I care about. and spend a evening of happy chatting, laughing and warm friendships. all while sitting outside in the summer air, as the sun went down.

tonight rain & lightning are in the air.